Bend or Break Free

There is a certain level of flexibility that every human obtains. A mental and emotional flexibility. We all conform to our lives, we all adapt. We all bend and sometimes we break.

My breaking point was The Drunk. I, myself, am not an alcoholic, I simply assumed the self-inflicted form of the victim. To become the victim of an alcoholic is extremely weakening and unnerving. Against my own character, I temporarily conformed to a life of unbalance. Through my eyes I could see that life in his world was unhinged but to him, the delusional alcoholic, nonsense was justifiable. I witnessed, repeatedly, a seemingly cordial spirit as it perished and began thriving on abuse. He came to life only when suffocating in his own routine. He became a demented and belligerent raptor, schizophrenic and paranoid by his own doing. His insanity amplified by fabricated accusations and duplicity. Night after sleepless night, I was the focus of his drunken rage. There was no need to provoke him, the alcohol was consumed in large enough amounts at a fast enough pace to tip the mental scale, sending him into a downward spiral of ignorance. At once, I became his prey. He wanted enough control to convince me that I was free while convincing himself that I couldn't escape... then I broke. Free. To a better life. Though he still stalks his prey and howls from his cave I am physically unscathed, only licking my mental wounds. The lesson is this;

Sobriety is a form of death to an alcoholic, an unrealistic demise that is disciplined only by the monsters. You will die with it if you don't break away.